目前分類:Thinking- 我思故我在 (27)

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一個台灣本土品牌,要多努力才能真正生存?要多努力才能打入國際市場?要多努力才能前進大陸市場?就連五月天都是努力了多少年才能站上北京鳥巢的舞台舉辦演唱會?

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人到了一定的年紀,想法也會跟著改變。以前我很介意的事情,現在也學著雲淡風輕;以前看不透想不開的執念,現在也學著輕輕放下。人生在世,追求夢想是一回事,追求幸福是一回事,但真正該做的就是活在當下,把現在此刻過好,把身體健康照顧好,把身邊的人照顧好,這樣就可以無愧於心。

以前,我很介意沒有朋友這件事,因為我是個怕寂寞的人,我總認為是自己有問題才會沒有朋友。而隨著時間、經歷、智慧的增長,我覺得人生中其實只有自己過得開心才是最重要的。學會跟自己相處,學會享受孤單,就再也不覺得寂寞。現在的我,假日如果一個人在家(隊友不在),我有做不完的事可以忙。曬棉被、縫衣服、研究食譜、寫網誌、看影集......我開始享受一個人的生活。

以前,我很介意所謂是非對錯,我常常認為這個世界非黑即白,事情總是要分對錯。但是在社會歷練久了,我明白這個世間沒有絕對的對錯,立場不同看法不一樣。我學著包容不一樣的意見,學著針對不一樣的立場分析情況,學著多一分體諒之心,不要理直氣壯、咄咄逼人。

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最近台灣社會充斥著香港的新聞,舉凡臉書、Line、電視媒體,到處都是這個議題。
繼總統大選黨內互打之後,終於又出現一個新的政治議題。
真的很煩!

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  • Mar 13 Wed 2019 17:40
  • 理由

如果做一件事總要先想好安撫自己的理由,那麼這是在騙別人還是在騙自己?

「我做......很辛苦,所以我要好好......(享樂)才能紓壓。」這樣的理由是逃避還是墮落?

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Positive thinking:
I am thankful for having a nice family, having people who care about me, having a wonderful husband, and having a variety of life experience.
I am thankful that life has made me kind but strong.

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2019年寫給他的第一封情書
愛你依舊

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這陣子一直都特別有感觸:

如果不是去美國留學,怎麼會認識前任?如果不是認識前任,怎麼會畢業後又去美國工作?如果不是在美國工作,怎麼會有足夠的機會練習英文?如果不是有與美國人共事的經驗,怎麼能讓自己與外國客戶溝通零距離?如果不是與前任走到盡頭,怎麼會想回台灣?如果沒有回台灣,怎麼能有核心特助的經驗?如果不是走入核心,怎麼知道經營公司竟有那麼多真相?如果不是離開了前公司,如何能在現在此刻,有更多時間協助自家的企業?這一連串的前因後果,認真思考下來,彷彿老天爺早就安排好,在天時、地利、人和之下,一切自然發生。

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  • Dec 15 Sat 2018 12:46
  • 心情

心情:
這陣子有點忙,連續幾天忙著翻譯文件跟整理編輯資料,忙起來常忘了時間。但我喜歡忙著點,才有存在的意義與價值。

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I have been very down recently. Too many things happened almost at the same time, and too many “coincidences” happened, which made me wonder if all these incidents were just a joke from “fate.” I started to think that maybe it’s all because of me. There’s no reason for me to believe that I deserve a peaceful life since I seemed to be the reason for my own distress. I started feeling pity for myself, and I looked for all kinds of excuses to blame for. I was so negative and hateful, and nothing seemed to be right or at least reasonable to me, nothing, at all. I hate myself, and I hate my life. I was like a beast looking for any possibility to hurt people, including me. I wanted someone to pay for my misery, and I wanted them to experience my pain. I felt that life was so not fair, and I wanted my “justice.” I was like a spoiled brat who thought I was a very important person and I deserve people’s respect. I “empowered” the dark side of me took over my mind, and all I could think of was to revenge and to prove that I could be somebody. I started showing my dark side of personality, and I was so angry most of the time. It feels like nothing can go right at this moment, and I am so alone.

After several days of “conversation” with myself, I started feeling calm. I have read so many articles and I decided to accept what happened. When life throws me a curve ball, I may not be able to catch it right away, but at least I can face it and figure out a better way to deal with the situation.

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Recently I read an article about not to call your friends when you are upset or angry.

At first I was quite against what the author says, because I thought friends should be there for each other whenever they need you. Every time when I was upset I thought of calling (or texting) someone to tell them how bad the situation was. Sometimes I felt better after I let it all out. I thought this was a healthier way to deal with my bad emotion.

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Dear mom,

You asked me how my married life is, I don’t feel any different other than the spouse icon has been filled on my ID card. I was so afraid of failure again and I was afraid that he might be different after we got married.

But the truth proves that I was wrong. He is still the same man that always holds my hand wherever we go.

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離開一個錯的環境才能讓自己更有力量找到對的環境。

2年多來,我一直在前公司浮沉,每天幾乎都不快樂,明明好像沒什麼重大事情發生,但就是覺得壓力很大、喘不過氣,每天回家就累癱了,什麼事情都不想做。

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Sometimes I look at myself and think: “maybe I deserve to be alone (lonely) without any close friend.”
I have always wanted to have a sister, but that’s not gonna happen.
So I thought maybe I could have a BFF(best friend forever) instead.

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I was so upset these days, especially yesterday some stupid things happened at work which was just overwhelming. I was angry, disappointed, and I hated everything, including this world. It felt like nothing can be right and I was living in a broken world.

I was crying and I really missed my friends. I felt so alone and I was fighting against this world by myself with no one standing by my side.

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最近比較有機會整理部落格,
把之前有些很棒的留言記錄一下。

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九把刀與交往10年的女友小內分手,將小三周亭羽扶正,買了7600萬豪宅準備結婚用。

看起來是九把刀對不起小內,周亭羽臉皮厚,堅持到最後的人才有豪宅住。

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因為好奇去搜尋洪素珠罵榮民的影片,看完一肚子火,而且勾起我之前在美國的回憶。

有一次我在美國用公共電話打回台灣,當時是用國際電話卡,可以講比較久一點。結果有位美國白人胖女人走過來,她也要用電話,站在我旁邊很不耐煩開始罵我,叫我去別的地方講(旁邊是賣場,裡面還有其他電話,她自己懶得走過去),我不客氣用英文回罵,叫她自己去別的地方打電話。然後她開始罵我髒話,說我是「畢曲」,還叫我滾回自己的國家,說我不屬於這裡。(You bi**h! Go back to your country! You don't belong here) 當下我不甘示弱「畢曲」她回去,也叫她滾。最後她自討沒趣走了,她很驚訝我會跟她對罵。

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英國自由主義思想家穆勒說過: “個人的自由,以不侵犯他人的自由為自由 。”  如果已經侵犯到他人的自由,則這就是假自由。言論自由是自由國家中最難能可貴的自由,卻不代表可以不為自己的言論負責。否則人人都可拿著自由的旗子,到處達伐自己看不慣的事物,造成別人的痛苦,那跟當初十字軍東征有什麼兩樣?

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剛結束一段長達八年的感情時,我的心是冷的。我下定決心不要再次輕易把心交出去,再也不許為誰傷心。傷痕累累的感情,疲累厭倦著這一切,不許自己再相信男人,把情感密封起來。我認為愛情世界如此無情,沒有誰非誰不可,『永遠』是不存在的形容詞。我開始沉淪,開始在愛情遊戲中放縱,過了一段荒唐的日子,直到你的出現。你說你不要一陣子的朋友,你要的是一輩子的牽手。我笑著說,這世上沒有什麼是永遠的,活在當下就好。抱持著遊戲人間的心態,我答應與你交往。你強烈感覺到我的輕浮,卻總是耐著性子隨著我的步伐前進。我時快時慢,不按牌理出牌,你始終走在我的左右,牽著我的手不隨便放手。就算有時候我因意識到自己的心動而退縮,你仍舊在我身後默默跟隨,給我時間讓我自己調整步調,再繼續牽起我的手一起走。


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Hi,
 
謝謝妳的來信, 抱歉這麼晚才回信給你

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